Timelines.. and patience..

Dear God..

Guide me..

Show me..

I understand.. Love doesn't mean "timelines"..

Yes.. Love is PATIENT. It's just that.. well.. Rachel's not..

If I love him.. as much as I say i do.. then.. love and he.. will always be there.. no matter when that day will come.. and I do believe that he loves me.. and he wants it..

Priorities..

He has his priorities.. and I want him to succeed.. not only for those alterior motives.. but because I do want to see him make something of himself.. he works hard.. and even though.. i do want.. what i want.. I also want to see him find satisfaction in his life.. and I'll help him.. I love him.. and that's what I'll do.

I just need guidance.. I know and I understand all that I need to know and understand.. but I have to start believing it in my heart..

I'm smart enough to know not to rush what isn't ready.. it would just put us into more problems than we really need.. and that isn't smart at all..

I know what I want.. and I know who I want it with.. but I also know that when i get it.. i don't want it to make it cause any unnecessary problems..

I'm not behind.. I'm not ahead.. it shouldn't matter what my other friends are doing.. it's not my life.. help me understand that God.. help me see that i shouldn't compare myself to everyone else.. and that my mother should do that either..

If I really look at it.. sure.. they are getting married.. but none of them have their careers set.. none of them are ready for children.. and they all will live in an apartment.. barely making ends meet..

I understand that all newlywed couples will struggle financially at first.. but if justyn and i are smart about it.. and wait til the right time.. then our struggles will be minimal.. and we'd be able to enjoy that time in our lives..

Help me and the people around me understand that it isn't a race.. please.. God.. because I need support from You.. and I don't need everyone around me asking what's going on.. I really don't..

Help me really understand that everything comes in Your time, God. Everything that happens to us.. happens according to when You think it is right.. not when I do.. what do I know? You are the one that knows what's going to happen to me.. You are the one that guides us through life..

I place my trust in You.. I always have.. and I always will. I know You will not steer me wrong.

I just need patience... I need guidance.. to fully grasp the things I already know..