Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Another one?

Dear God,

So, here we are again. You've given me another relationship to deal with. You've given me someone new. You've helped us progress from talking.. to dating.. to dating just each other.. to now.. an actual boyfriend/girlfriend relationship.

You've given me another one to try to hold on to.. or to lose all over again.

I guess You always had Your reasons. If I hadn't broken up with all the guys I have been in relationships before.. then I would have never been in this relationship. It all happened for a reason.

But seriously, I am sooo tired of the whole process of starting over again.. only to be broken hearted in the end. I want this one to be the last one. This will be the last one.. whether it works out or not. I just don't think that I will be able to handle trying again if this one doens't work out anymore.

God.. I do want it to work out with him.

Not just because I feel this is my last shot.

But because I really do like him.. a lot more than I really admit to liking him. He makes me smile and I have not been this happy in awhile. I feel secure and safe in his presence. I know that he cares. I feel that he cares. There's a comfort level that seemed so instant.

I don't want to ruin this nor do I want it ruined at all.

I'm just scared. Every relationship I've had has ended. What could make this the exception?!?!

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